How Having Kids Kept Me Humble
I Thought I Was a Pretty Good Christian
I came to know Jesus in my early twenties. And honestly, I thought I was doing pretty well. I went to church regularly, showed up for Bible study, read His Word, served when I could. I was easy-going, friendly, and naturally patient. Of course I wasn’t perfect, but in my heart, I thought — I’m a pretty good Christian.
Then I Became a Mom
Everything changed. The patience I thought I had? Gone. Just vanished. I yell more than I ever imagined I would. Not because I want to. Not because I’m trying to lose control. But because some mornings feel like battles I’m losing — late for school, shoes missing, jackets on backwards, and a toddler who suddenly wants to bring a watermelon to church. I find myself saying the same thing four, five, ten times — and they just don’t listen. And that once-patient, easy-going me? She’s nowhere to be found. Everyday Frustration and My Breaking Point It’s frustrating in ways I never expected. “You can’t play with a knife. It’s not safe.” “No! I want to play with it.” “It’s dangerous. You could hurt yourself or others.” “No! But I want to!” Sound familiar? And just when I think I’ve reached my breaking point, something else happens that breaks me in a different way — in the heart.
A Lesson From a Toy Camera
My daughter saw a toy camera in the store before her 4th birthday. I already had gifts in mind — something better, something real. But she clung to that cheap plastic one. I tried to reason with her, gently stall her, shift her attention. But she wouldn’t let it go. She had to have that one. Finally, I told her, “I was going to get you a better one for your birthday — a real one. But if you insist on this one, maybe I won’t get the better one.” She didn’t care. She didn’t even hear me. She just wanted what she could see right now. God Showed Me Myself Later that night, God gently turned that moment around. “Isn’t this how you are with Me?” How many times have I clung to what I want now instead of trusting Him for what He’s preparing for later? How many times have I prayed for something I thought was good, only to get frustrated or hurt when God said no — or simply didn’t respond the way I hoped? That day, I saw myself clearly — not as the calm, collected believer I thought I was, but as a child. Stubborn. Shortsighted. Insistent. Unreasonable.
It Was Never About Me
I saw that all the patience I thought came from me was really just God’s grace holding me together all this time. I’m not “good” because I’ve got it together — I’m only good because Christ is in me. Parenting peeled back the polished version of myself and showed me what was underneath — my capacity to yell, to snap, to wound with words. It showed me how deeply I need a Savior, every single day. And in that place of weakness, God didn’t shame me. He met me. He’s still meeting me.
The Refining Work of Parenthood
Having kids has humbled me in ways I never saw coming. It has exposed my need and deepened my understanding of grace. It has reminded me that I’m not the steady, strong one in this home — He is. And the more I lean on Him, the more I can love like Him. So if you’re in that place — where the yelling shocks you, the anger scares you, the guilt weighs heavy — you’re not alone. And you’re not broken beyond repair. You’re being refined. Parenting isn’t just about raising your children — it’s about God raising you, too. Let the hard moments draw you nearer to the only One who can give you new mercies each morning — and enough grace for both you and your little ones.
